Titmouse
woodpecker
We had about 6 inches of snow yesterday. It started about 12:00 Pm and snowed until 10:00 PM. It was a satisfying snow: heavy, blanketing everything. The top of of our mountain is beaufitul. Marty hung bird feeders outside my office windows and I set up a tripod so I can get quick pics of the bird.
Fortunately, the driveway melted enough that I could so sing this afternoon in Lancaster. I've been winded, tired and have had a dry mouth, so I didn't know how it would go. We were a small group, but I though we sounded just great.
I have a couple of visits tomorrow to which I am looking forward.

#6

Lilly and Priscilla were starting to get a little cranky. It was time for everyone to eat lunch and take a nap. Fortunately, getting off the train, navigating the platform, escalators and turnstiles distracted everyone from grumpiness. While they were discussing the merits of taking a cab, bus or walking the rest of the way, a cab pulled up and solved the dilemma. As they all piled in the with the bags, Lily piped up:

Mami,Today we rode on the bus and an airplane and moving sidewalks and a train and a eslator and a taxi.

Lucy laughed and asked," is there anything you didn't ride?

She wrinkled her brow and pondered. A boat? a donkey? a bike?
Lucy laughed and thought of their transportation book which they read over and over. She was surprised that Lily had left out the howdah and the rickshaw.

Priscilla was growing heavy in Lucy's lap and she hoped it wasn't far. Lunch before a nap would pay off later on. As she was attempting to distract her with what going by the windows, the cab pulled over and they reversed the process:unloading kids, suitcases, and backpacks. As Lucy set 'cilla on the ground,'cilla hugged Lucy's leg,arched her back and whined "llevame mami". Discretion being the better part of valor, Lucy quickly decided this wasn't a battle worth fighting, and picked her up. However, as they reached the second floor, Lucy was winded and had to set her down. cilla. I am so tired. Would you like to have Uncle Phil carry you or would you like to walk?
She thought about it and said "Aunt Tracy carry me". Tracy laughed and reached her arms out.
Lucy sighed and shook her head. Would this child ever get easier? She handed her to Tracy and took Lily's hand to divert her from getting upset from abdicating Tracy to Pricilla. .
She said in Spanish. "Mami is so tired. Will you help me up the steps?" A brief shadow crossed her eyes as she realized she was being manipulated, but she answered "Come Mami. I will help you." Lucy sighed and shook her head again. Would this sweet child always be deferring, always trying to please? And, was she going to foster it? She'd talk to her mom about it later. She still had another flight of stairs to conquer.

On the train

Lucy shot Phil a sharp sideways look, marveling that he still harbored feeling of sibling rivalry for his older brother.
Aren't you a little old for this Phil?

You're right. I'm sorry Luce. I just felt so bad for you, all alone at the luggage carousel, pregnant, with the little girls. He always puts his own agenda ahead of everyone elses.

But Phil, his agenda is serving God. That has to be first.

Phil's face hardened as he said:
God gave him a lovely little family to take care of, that should be his first priority.

Well, you are half right about that. That's why I've come home. It's time for the girls to live in the states. I want to make sure they learn English properly. I want them to know their family

Phil gave Lucy a hug and they both sat with their thoughts for a moment. She glanced over at Pricilla and the other one busily coloring and chatting with Tracy. She noticed alot of folks talking on their cell phones.
Phil does everyone have a cell phone now? Everyone is talking on their phones.

Just about. Do you want to use mine?

Acutally I would. Could I call my Mom? Let me look for her number.

It's programed into my phone. Let me show you. Here push this button until you find Rose.

Phil, I'm feeling a little faint from culture shock.

Phil laughed one of his particularly comforting laughs and dialed the phone for her. Lucy took a deep breath and tried to relax. When was the last time she had heard her mother's voice?

Her mother answered. "hello Phil"

It's not Phil, Mum, it's me Lucy! She choked a little hearing her mother's voice.

Her mom screamed Lucy! Where are you?

I'm on the train, heading to Phil and Tracy's house. How are you?

I'm great now that I hear your voice. I have a surprise for you.

I don't know how many more surprises I can take in one day. What is it?

when i heard you were coming came to Chicago I drove in and I'm waiting at Phil's house.

I can believe it. You are here? You drove from Pennsylvania?
Lucy wept a little, anticipating her mother's arms around her, the smell of her hair, a little lacquered with hairspray.

Rose's voice was garbled, Lucy frowned and mouthed to Phil, "I can't hear." Phil took the phone and said
"Rose we are going underground. We will see you when we get there."

They submerged underground. The girls startled.
"It's just like a tunnel girls. Guess what? Grandma Rose is waiting for us at Phil and Tracey's house. We are going to see Grandma."
Yeah! !they shouted, even though they hadn't seen Rose since Pricilla was born.

The rest of the ride went quickly as they gathered up their things and prepared to disembark.
"Next stop is Lincoln Square. Doors open on the right at Lincoln Square." Said the CTA guy, whose voice had become familiar after hearing it for so many stops.

As she stepped out on the platform Lucy had a feeling of destiny: of a new world opeing up to her.

#4 The Suitcases

Lily ran along the edge of the conveyor belt, searching for their bag. She remembered that they had tied a bit of bright cloth on their suitcase to distinguish it from the other black suitcases. As they watched, Lucy tiredly thought, "Two kids, one really big suitcase, one moderately pregnant belly which all needed to go down the escalator and to the train. She wondered how much the tickets were now. Did she have to pay for the kids? The last time she was in Chicago seemed so long ago. Lily started jumping and down screaming "There is our bag. Get it mami. Get it! Apurate! Hurry! As Lucy stepped forward to haul the bag off the belt, a voice behind her said, "I'll get it."
She looked up and saw her brother-in-law , Phil, sweep the bag off the belt with a grin. "We thought we'd surprise you". He nodded his head and she saw Martha approaching. She looked around for the girls and found them behind her, clinging to her skirt , suddenly shy.
"Look Lily, look Cilla it's Aunt Martha"
Martha knew children and didn't crowd them. She pulled two little wrapped gifts out of her bag and did what any good aunt does: Bribed them with gifts for a hug. It worked and while the girls were occupied with hugs and presents, she turned to Phil. She hugged him and started to thank him, but as soon as she felt the strength in his embrace, she dissolved into his arms and much to her surprise, burst in to tears. The trip had been so hard and the relief of having some help blindsided her emotions. She wept for a moment in his embrace, then took a breath and tried to smile.
"Hey I'm happy to see you too. Are you ok? Is there another suitcase? We were going to bring the car, but we have no car seats. Should we get a cab.?"
Lucy said "I promised Lily the train. It will be great now that you guys can help me with the girls. She tore Martha away from the girls and their new coloring books long enough to hug her
"Martha, you are a godsend. I'm having culture shock or something."
Surly little Pricilla took an instant liking to her Aunt Martha and cooperated with hand holding and careful steps down the escalator. Lily, loath to leave Marta, took Lucy's hand and Phil followed with the suitcase. Lucy's felt her burden lightened, at least for the moment and practically floated onto the train.
Phil settled into a seat beside Lucy and as the train pulled out, commented " I half expected to see my brother standing there with you."
"That would have been great, but he has so many things to finish up. I didn't want to wait any longer because of the baby."
"When do you think he will come? Your baby won't wait forever."
Lucy laughed, "I sure hope not! I think he should be able to leave in a month. Six weeks at the latest."
"Is he the same Lucy?"
"What do you mean?"
"You know driven, perfectionist, so serious about every thing?"

#3 12/6/08 Mary and Martha

Luke 10:38-42

[38] As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. [39] She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. [40] But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!"

[41] "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, [42] but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Lucy finished reading the story and asked, "What do you think of the sisters?" She had hoped to encourage the women in their spiritual lives, to claim the right that Jesus gave Mary to sit at the spiritual table. The culture and the Catholic church both side-lined women from leadership and service.

The women sat quietly, glancing at each other, confused. Lucy's stomach sank, as she thought "I've probably just done something culturally inappropriate. Were they not used to being asked their opinions, or were they trying to figure out what it was that she wanted to them to say?".

She tried again. "Jesus told Martha that Mary had chosen well to listen to his teaching and that He wouldn't take that away from her. I think Jesus is telling us that women have to right to study and learn about the Bible."

Finally, Pilar spoke up, "Pues, si," "Well yes, but how will Jesus and the disciples eat if every one is sitting at his feet listening. The food doesn't make itself." The ice broken, the women's chatter flowed. There seemed to differing opinions. The younger women supporting Mary, saying, "The men and our mothers' just want us in the kitchen, cooking, when there are interesting things going on the the living room. The older ones scoffed, "Its all just talk, air. We serve God by serving our families."

Lucy although pleased with the discussion, had felt a little unsure about the direction it had taken. In the Bible studies at home the older women had always kept things on track following the party line of the church. Mary was elevated for learning from Jesus and Martha was criticized for being worldly and unconcerned with spiritual things. It had always been a bit confusing for Lucy, because at the same time, women were taught to submit to their husbands and that men were the head of women.

Remembering the beginning of their time together, Lucy felt a deep pang of loss for her friends in Cochabamba. She startled as Lily started jumping up and down with joy as the suitcases started spilling out on the baggage belt. She shook her head at the delight children take in the most mundane things. When had she grown out of that?

# 2 The airport 11/24/09

He reviewed the tapes before he let the girls see them. Dora and Blues's Clues were declared acceptable but he could find nothing to redeem Sponge Bob Squarepants. Luke passion for doing the right thing and maintaining standards was what had first attracted her to him at college. He was so good-looking and stable in comparison to most of the other boys whom were focused on sports, drinking or chasing girls.
Doing the right thing, staying pure before God was the focus of his life. Sure he was stable, but his obsessiveness with pureness was the flip side of the dependable coin. The side that took the fun out of life sometimes. He did seem to delight in the package from his mom that Janai had brought him. His mom had sent his favorite packaged snack foods and some boxes of breakfast cereal. It was obvious that Janai just considered herself just the messenger. She figured Luke had everything he needed when he moved her best friend to this god forsaken place and kept those dear babies 4000 miles away.
The dear babies were now gamely marching along looking adorable, though disheveled, with their matching backpacks made from Indian weave. Lucy felt the sting of loss thinking of the love sewn into those backpacks by the senoras in the sewing co-operative. That was the one thing she truly loved and would miss about Bolivia. It was also the one time that it mattered enough to stand up to Luke. He had wanted her start a Bible Study with the ladies, but when she saw the beautiful things they made, and how poor they were, she knew in her heart that they needed more than words and faith. It had started at the first Bible study when she had asked the ladies to bring something they had made. It was the typical white church lady icebreaker to get to know each other. She was astounded by their brilliant woven cloths, knitted alpaca sweaters and intricate embroidery. Her own knitted dishcloth looked like it had been knitted by Lily. She was too embarrassed to get out the simple craft project the had planned.
Only three women showed up, so they talked about their lives and their children, their hopes and dreams while they knitted and wove. They showed Lucy how to set up weaving and few words in Quechua. Her lesson on Mary, Martha and service seemed beside the point, as apparently they already lived their lives in service to their family and their community. As they left, she thought that perhaps next week she would get a take on their religious views.
"I've gone native" she thought, remembering that was the first thing that they had counseled her against in missionary training. And at her very first Bible Study too! She told Luke that that it had gone well with building relationships with the woman and about their beautiful work. He had congratulated her, thanked her for doing this for the ministry, but suggested that perhaps the next time she get the Bibles out and gave her a few tips on group dynamics.
She knew he was right and the next week she had Mary and Martha dusted off and ready to go. When she arrived, she was surprised to find that each of last week's participants had brought 2 friends and there was a total of 10 women there, all anxious to show off their handiwork! She admired more beautiful weaving and knitting and announced in her sometimes halting Spanish that she had a story to tell them.*****

Getting started 11/4/08

June 2004

Lucy drew a deep breath as the plane touched down on the O'Hare runway. The slight queasiness that she always felt at landing dissipated as plane taxied to the gate. She sighed again and thought, "Well now", too overwhelmed and tired to think anything else.

Her fellow travelers divided themselves into two groups: The overhead compartment retrievers and and the cell phone users. Up and down the airplane cabin, the former were making a racket snapping open the the compartment doors. The latter were turning on their cell phones in a cacophony of rings, chime, beeps and the tinny bits from well known symphonies. She caught a snatch of "badadadadat dada", the 1812 Overature and felt a little dizzy with sensory overstimulation.

The clamor and activity was overwhelming. Just twenty four hours ago she had loaded herself and her children on the collectivo, really not much more than a school bus to cross the altiplano to board the plane in La Paz. When she left the states 8 years ago, there were few cell phones in the States and none in Bolivia. She sighed deeply again in the midst of the confusion, amazed that her children were still asleep. The had been traveling for hours and their little physical and emotional reserves had been drained dry. She dreaded waking them. Her own reserve of energy and patience, usually deep as an artesian well, was down to a trickle.

Lily would wake up quickly, look around. then launch into a litany of questions and comments unique to five-year-olds. Priscilla would wake up cranky. At two, she had limited ability to make sense of her return to the world of wakefulness. Lucy said a little "Jesus help me" sort of prayer. She had neither the strength for Lily's nonstop chatter or Priscilla's volatile entrance from the world of sleep. Thankfully the new baby, yet unborn was low maintenance: peacefully tumbling about in his or her own tranquil world. The lethargy of early pregnancy had passed and the weightiness of the last months was still in the future.

"Lily, honey we're here"

Her blue eyes snapped open. She surveyed the plane aisles, noticed the passengers disembarking and smiled. "Are we there?" "Are we in Chicago?" "Where are Uncle Phil and Aunt Martha?" "Are we going on a train?"

Lucy reviewed for her, once again, the plan for getting the bags, taking the train downtown to meet her brother-in-law, Phil and his new wife Martha. Tired as she was, Lucy couldn't help smiling at Lily's questions about Phil and Martha, acting as if they were intimate friends, instead of persons she only knew from pictures and conversations. Lucy had wanted her children to be connected to their American family, so kept photo albums and regularly reviewed them with Lily and Priscilla, encouraging them to say goodnight and kiss pictures of grandparents, aunts and uncles.

Lily's five year old sensibilities for the need to know what happens next seemed to be satisfied, at least for the moment.
"Pack your backpack sweetie" I'm going to wake up 'Cilla.
Lily shot her a look of "here it comes" that exactly mirrored how Lucy felt. Priscilla, bless her little heart, began to wake up on her own, rubbed her face on Lucy's arm a few times and began to take an interest in the lady holding a little dog in the aisle. Lucy herself did a double take; who know one could take a dog in a tote bag on a plane. Things had changed while she was gone.

"Cilla, mi corazon, we're here, get your backpack."

The trip to the baggage area was uneventful, but felt like a marathon. Not for the first time, Lucy regretted making the trip alone. Maybe she should have waited until Luke could have come with her to help. The girls were fascinated with the moving walkways and ads. Their small city in Bolivia was isolated and technology was limited to local TV, radio and billboards. The children weren't completely isolated from American culture. There was a TV and VCR that they used in their ministry that the kids could watch. Most of their packages were stolen or held ransom by the post office for unreasonable tariffs, but her jetsetter college roommate Janae had brought American video tapes on her most recent visit; a side trip when she had finished hiking Machu Pichu. Janai, still appalled that Lucy had forsaken her life to live in the tropics attempting the impossible task of saving the Bolivians' souls, had brought a treasure trove of American culture.
Janae's suitcases burped out some trendy clothes for Lucy and Baby Gap for the girls. The moment became tense when the suitcase produced video tapes of American cartoons. She watched Luke's mouth straighten from mildly amused to a grim tight line as Dora, Blues Clues and Sponge Bob Square Pants spilled out.